Today, at work I was talking with my friend who we will refer to as Jared. Jared said to me that he felt trapped in his relationship. He expressed that he felt he had to stay with his girlfriend “Because they had been together for years.” Even though he had not been happy for months. Throughout our discussion, I quickly realized that Jared was experiencing the idea of feeling morally obligated. Jared's situation perfectly illustrated this idea. He believes he should be loyal to her simply because of their shared history and mutual friends. Even though he fully understands and recognizes that this loyalty is costing him his happiness. He mentioned feeling guilty whenever he thinks about leaving, which only makes it harder on himself. This battle between his values and feelings was clear, and it made me realize how difficult it could be to navigate. Looking back on our conversation, I feel bad for Jared, and want to do my best to support him. With that said though, I also worry about him feeling trapped in a situation that no longer serves him. I encouraged him to consider his own needs and to communicate openly with her about his feelings. It is going to be important for him to find his own happiness, rather than feeling bound to his current relationship because of guilt. This conversation reminded me how important prioritizing one’s well-being is in relationships, and it has inspired me to be more open, and willing to talk within my own situations.
Discussion about this post
No posts